Addendum...

I just wanted to add that I do often give food to panhandlers. I pass out homemade cookies and girlscout cookies. I buy an extra meal when I go through a drive through and hand it to hungry looking beggars. I sometimes wonder though, how so many have money to pay for cigarettes when they have no money for food!

The Politics of Panhandling....

There is no law in Bellingham prohibiting panhandling.... A variety of people stand on street corners asking for a handout. Some need the help. Some, well, let us say NOT SO MUCH! Today as I drove Clepson to our first riding lesson we passed a clean cut woman and her little boy begging for a handout. This lady occupies this particular street corner most days. I have seen her with her young boy and with a baby in a stroller and her husband. They have been panhandling for several months.

The lady on the street corner makes me ANGRY! She holds a sign that says her family lost all to a fire and needs money. In the US we have many programs to help people in crisis. A family of four can receive food stamps, welfare, counseling, job training and child care. They have access to free medical care (a medical card or medicare). Able bodied people can also do things the old fashioned way and GET A JOB. I often work over 40 hours a week. My dear husband Terry is up by 4:00 most mornings and rarely gets finished working until 10:00 in the evening. Terry works on weekends and on his vacations. We work hard to be able to afford to feed our family and have a home. We have luxuries like cable tv and cell phones. We have pets that need vet care that we work hard to afford. It makes me LIVID to see able bodied families asking for a handout on the street. WHAT ARE THEY TEACHING THEIR CHILDREN!

I can understand a mother not wanting to put their child in daycare. I quit a lucrative career as a lawyer to stay home and raise my children. I still managed to work. I packed my infant boy in a frontpack and taught riding lessons. I sat him in a swing while I rode training horses. I was not an absentee mother and I think every mom should be able to raise her own kids. BUT, if push came to shove I would have done what I needed to to take care of the needs of our children. We would have moved our family home to our parents house, we would have taken advantage of social services. I would have worked while they slept at night! I would NOT STAND WITH MY HAND OUT ASKING FOR CHARITY.

This hits so close to home when I am seeing this family through the eyes of Clepson. He sees a well dressed "Blanc" standing with a cardboard sign as her child plays with a new toy at her feet. She does not look like she has missed many meals. Her son looks well clean and well fed. Clepson asked "they are hungry?". I said "NO". He said "they ask for money?". I said "yes, they ask for money they do not need".

I tried to explain about the available social services. I tried to explain why a family would beg for money they do not need for survival. If this family could see real suffering for just one day.....

The Nanna is Coming, The Nanna is Coming....

It is that exciting and stressful time of year... My mother, known widely as Nanna, is coming for her annual visit. Nanna is delightful, Nanna is the favorite of all of her children, Nanna is the favorite of all of her GRAND children, BUT...... Nanna can be a bit bossy. Point if fact, two years ago the Nanna told me I needed to MULCH MY FLOWER BEDS and STAIN MY DECK. Last year, I just avoided the fact that we had been to busy or lax to get these chores done by seeing Nanna at my Sister Sarah's house (www.ourhaitianjourney.blogspot.com). Of course, my Sis, mother of 14, has not trouble keeping on top of her house and yard! I am determined this year to have the deck stained and the beds mulched! I have in fact been running myself RAGGED trying to get the extra work done! Add to this two part time jobs, end of school activities and Clepson's doctors' appointments and you get a cranky Nina.

Yesterday I decided a new policy. If I AM WORKING, THE KIDS SHOULD BE TOO! Zoe hopped right in to help me outside (she is my little gardener), the boys remained inside and were in charge of general pick up and cleaning the bathroom they use which had begun to smell a bit like a urinal. The boys did a fairly good job cleaning, but the bathroom was still stinky. I pulled out the cleaning products and gave a tutorial on scrubbing the toilet and floor. How Noah has missed out on this fun chore in the last 11 years is beyond me! Clepson is now a certified toilet scrubbing champ!

Today was a long work day. Clepson came with me on several horse training jobs and we got home just as Noah and Zoe got off the bus. We had a snack and then I was back out side painting and putting the first coat of blue paint on the deck. I had warned the kids and Terry NOT TO LET THE DOGS OUT. Terry somehow forgot and opened the door and my sweet Kiwi dog came running across the fresh paint. I spoke some seriously foul words only to see Terry holding the phone out to me----YIKES! I said I couldn't talk right now and Terry then failed to find out who was on the line so I could call back and apologise! Zoe caught Kiwi and sent him in through he window to Clepson who washed off his paws. Of course we now have tiny pawprints across the deck and blue pawprints on our fancy stone patio! ARGH! I am sure I will see the humor someday.....

PRE-OPERATIVE!

Clepson went for his preoperative visit with Dr. Ford today. Clepson was very nervous! I explained to him before we went that Dr. Ford was only going to take a look at his eye again and would answer any questions about the surgery we had. Dr. Ford explained that the surgery would remove Clepsons' blind and painful eye and that he would place a orbital implant in the eye. Clepson will be under general anesthesia for the surgery and we told him he would feel no pain. When Clepson wakes up he will possibly have a headache and some pain. We will control this with pain medication and ointments. Hopefully any pain Clepson experiences will be quickly under control and he will heal well. Clepson was pretty quiet during the meeting. We went to Dairy Queen for an ice cream cone after and when we returned home I showed Clepson some photos of other children "before and after" their own eye surgeries. It will be several months before Clepson is healed enough to get fitted for his "new eye". I can't wait to see him with a normal looking eye that gives him no pain.

In the US the prosthetic eye is polished and checked twice a year. In five years it will need to be replaced. This worries me as there are no oculists in Haiti. We will have to pray that a solution to this problem is found!

A Walk in the Park or When we LOST Clepson!

Much paperwork, networking and prayer has gotten us to the point of bringing Clepson to the U.S. for this surgery that will change his life. Today Clepson spent the morning at my sister Sarah's house (http://www.ourhaitianjourney.blogspot.com/) . I know that Clepson has been lonely when my kids are at school from 8-4 every day. I brought Sarah's 10 yr. old son Dom home to keep Clepson company this afternoon and tomorrow while the kids are in school. Sarah has been homeschooling her children this year and Dom is almost finished with all of his curriculum, so he will work on math tomorrow while Clepson works on math and french.

Everything was going well today. The boys helped me clean the car and I was working in the gardens when Dom asked if they could ride bikes in the spectacular, LARGE park behind our house. This park has MILES of trails, a HUGE waterfall and pond and river. It is a fun place to play, but we have MANY rules to keep the kids safe while they are there. Our town is a safe place to live but I have seen too much Oprah and like them to always stick together when they are out of my sight. I also asked Dom to keep on our side of the creek, which only gave the boys a 1/2 mile loop to ride the bikes on and they would be within yelling distance if there were any issues or I wanted them home. About 15 minutes went by and Dom came riding up on his bike. He asked if Clepson had returned home and my heart DROPPED!

The answer to that was a big NO and I began to pray as Dom and I searched the park for Clepson. Clepson had wanted to ride ahead of Dom (who is VERY little for his age, more like a 6 yr. old than a 10 yr. old in size) and Dom had told him the rule was "stick together" at all times. Clepson may have misunderstood, or may have thought Dom was joking, or may have thought this "little" kid didn't know what the rules were, but he took off on the bike without Dom.

The fifteen minutes we searched seemed like HOURS. I kept thinking, why didn't I make Clepson memorize our phone number and address! Did Clepson know our last name? How would he find his way home?

Dom found Clepson who was promptly sent for a shower and bed (at 3:30 in the afternoon). I gave him some time (he took a nap) and then sat and told him "what would I tell Mommie Sherry" (http://www.loveachild.com/) if I lost her Clepson! I explained the dangers of being alone in the park and that he had scared me. I also told him his punishment was no different than I would treat Noah and Zoe and that I wanted to treat him as my own son while he was with us.

All is well now and Clepson will hopefully limit his adventures to the healing sort that he came for!

A Chance to Dress Up!

On Tuesday we had the opportunity to dress up. It was the 5th grade strings all town concert. Noah had said last week before Clepson arrived that he needed some "dress" clothes. We are a very casual family living in an equally casual town. Noah has NEVER before worn a tie and hasn't worn a dress shirt in several years. I hit the local thrift store and was able to find some wonderful dress pant, shirt, tie combinations for Clepson and Noah and some wonderful dress shoes too! The boys were so excited and Clepson helped Noah tie his tie. Clepson was actually better with the tie than Terry;)

Of course, miss Zoe has loads of dresses that she will wear at the drop of a hat! The new school the kids go to has been disappointingly casual for Zoe's taste. It was fun to get some photos of the crew all dressed in their best. We enjoyed the concert and then headed to the Dairy Queen drive through for some ice cream in "cups" (aka cones). Clepson was very excited. His favorite foods so far are Pizza and ice cream. He would gladly eat Pizza every meal!

Inspiration

Tonight I am watching one of my favorite shows with Clepson. So You Think You Can Dance is on and I love to watch the dancers compete in an area I could never master. Clepson is very musical and also says he is not a good dancer, but loves to watch the dancing. I had forgotten that one of the finalists is from Haiti. Vittolio is a young Haitian man. He is an amazing dancer. In fact, he looks a bit like Clepson. Clepson was sitting waiting to see that Haitian dance. They did a short background piece on Vittolio. It turns out he grew up in a Haitian orphanage! Clepson's was amazed! To see another boy who grew up without parents in an orphanage on American TV excelling in his career and competing for $250,000 is quite inspirational.